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Affiliated with Men
for HAWC
and The Men's Initiative for Jane Doe
www.strongmendontbully.com ©2002
All rights reserved.
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FREQUENTLY
ASKED QUESTIONS
WHO ARE THESE MEN?
Many people,
when they hear about GMADA, assume all 550 of us are one particular kind
of guy. But the truth is we aren't all any one thing--except men.
This is who we are. Many of us are military veterans; several of us have
spent time in prison; quite a few are in recovery from alcohol or drug
addictions, and/or being abusive. About half of us grew up in families
with abusive fathers, and some with abusive mothers and fathers; many
became the son who wasn't going to walk in our father's shoes; but some
of us followed in our fathers footsteps and a few of us are still
struggling with issues of abuse and control. Some of us were lucky and
our parents got it more or less right, and some of us have gotten it more
or less right with our partners or in our marriages. About eighty of us
are teenage boys; one of us is a current All-American football player
and many of us are serious athletes. Many of us earn our livings with
our hands, carpentry is the biggest category, plus plumbing, electrical,
fishing, car repair, cooking, bartending, etc; a few of us are doctors,
clergy, bankers, teachers, businessmen. Several of us are gay men. Several
are bikers and custom car fanatics.
HOW OFTEN DOES YOUR ORGANIZATION MEET?
We are not
so much an organization as an attitude. Small groups of us do meet to
plan, do mailings, etc. A handful of us are activists, and
we tend to meet in a scheduled way. . But our larger intention is for
all of us to represent this attitude in our words and actions in our homes
and where we work.
WHY DO YOU FOCUS ON MEN BEING ABUSIVE WHEN WOMEN
CAN BE ABUSIVE, TOO?
This question
comes from women just about as often as from men. We know that women can
abuse men and children, and we know that women can abuse restraining order
laws. But the vast majority of the problem, and the part we men can do
something about, is abuse by men. When people say women hit men, we remind
them that men we know have said they laugh when they are hit by a woman.
On the other hand when women are hit by men the injuries are often terrible.
We tell anyone who doesnt believe us to talk with ambulance drivers
or undertakers.
IS THIS APPROACH WORKING?
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